Loving One More Joanna's journal in Haiti

This past week has been a big one and I have found myself doing a lot thinking, reflecting and just trying to wrap my mind around it all.

On the 4th of July, I couldn’t help but think of freedom in a whole new way this year.  Since I have a personal encounter of my own freedom, it made we appreciate more than ever before the freedom that we have in our country.  There was one night about 3 days after the earthquake that I laid in bed trying to fall asleep as the tears welled up in my eyes.  It was the first time that my freedom as a citizen of the United States really meant something to me.  All because I had a US passport, I was able to leave Haiti at any moment, no questions asked.  It seemed so unfair to me yet there was an underlying amount of comfort.  I had seen lines of people doing everything they could to maybe get a chance to escape the pain and suffering we were all living in.  I had dear friends that were trying to get their children that were in the process of adoption out and there were many challenges.  It made me think, freedom is a gift and I need to thank ALL who have served our country to make freedom what it is today.

This past Friday I celebrated my 35th birthday! I couldn’t have asked for a better day.  I started out my day waking up at the cabin with some of my dearest friends.  It was a beautiful morning so I set out on a walk.  As I looked around at God’s creation, I just felt different.  This is a feeling that some of you have experienced before but for me it was a first.  I had so much gratitude for life in that moment.  I didn’t want any gifts for my birthday (I usually have a pretty good list). I was so content to be alive and celebrating my life.  To be so close to death, has made me reevaluate all I am, all I have and all I want to be.  I have so much to give thanks for and on my birthday it just seemed to be more of a gift than I could have ever imagined.

As I sit and reflect this morning (Monday), I can’t help but have some heaviness in my heart.  Six months ago, this afternoon was the earthquake.  It is hard to imagine that it really did happen and all that has gone on in my life and those around me I love so dearly.  Lots of good has happen, but there is so much that still needs to be done.  Please continue to pray for the people of Haiti, the missionaries that are living their lives to help the best they can and for the government of Haiti. It seems pretty challenging and overwhelming today but God is bigger than I can imagine and I need to give it over to Him.